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Quincy Jones has two daughters with his ex-wife, Peggy Lipton. Both daughters- Rashida and Kidada are biracial and both of them had major issues with their racial identity growing up. They revealed this in detail in a Glamour Magazine interview several years ago and we think this is still a very relevant topic today.[/FONT]
[FONT=open_sansregular]Rashida was known as the one who passed for White while they were growing up, according to her sister, Kidada. Kidada tried everything in her power to be Black because she simply didnt fit in with her mother, her sister, nor her White friends. They gave very detailed and interesting accounts of their racial identity issues and their mother and Quincy also chimed in.[/FONT]
[FONT=open_sansregular]Here are some excerpts from their interview:[/FONT]
RASHIDA: I wouldnt trade my family for anything. My mother shocked her Jewish parents by marrying out of her religion and race. And my father: growing up poor and black, buckling the odds and becoming so successful, having the attitude of I love this woman! Were going to have babies and to hell with anyone who doesnt like it!
KIDADA: We had a sweet, encapsulated family. We were our own little world. But theres the warmth of love inside a family, and then theres the outside world. When I was born in 1974, there were almost no other biracial familiesor black familiesin our neighborhood. I was brown-skinned with short, curly hair. Mommy would take me out in my stroller and people would say, What a beautiful baby
whose is it? Rashida came along in 1976. She had straight hair and lighter skin. My eyes were brown; hers were green. In preschool, our mother enrolled us in the Buckley School, an exclusive private school. It was almost all white.
RASHIDA: In reaction to all that differentess, Kidada tried hard to define herself as a unique person by becoming a real tomboy.
KIDADA: While Rashida wore girly dresses, I loved my Mr. T dolls and my Jaws T-shirt. But seeing the straight hair like the other girls had, like my sister had
I felt: Its not fair! I want that hair!
Rashida Jones (L); Kidada Jones (R)PEGGY: I was the besotted mother of two beautiful daughters Id had with the man I lovedI saw Kidada through those eyes. I thought she had the most gorgeous hairthose curly, curly ringlets. I still think so!
KIDADA: One day a little blond classmate just out and called me Chocolate bar. I shot back: Vanilla!
QUINCY: I felt deeply for Kidada; I thought racism would be over by the eighties. My role was to put things in perspective for her, project optimism, imply that things were better than theyd been for me growing up on the south side of Chicago in the 1930s.
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Kidada then began to rebel because of learning disabilities and her different skin and hair:[/FONT]
KIDADA: I had another hurdle as a kid: I was dyslexic. I was held back in second grade. I flunked algebra three times. The hair, the skin, the frustration with schoolwork: It was all part of the shake. I was a strong-willed, quirky childmischievous.
RASHIDA: Kidada was cool. I was a dork. I had a serious case of worship for my big sister. She was so strong, so popular, so rebellious.
KIDADA: I was kicked out of
Buckley in second grade for behavior problems. I didnt want my mother to come to my new school. If kids saw her, it would be: your moms white! I told Mom she couldnt pick me up; she had to wait down the street in her car. Did Rashida have that problem? No! She passed for white.
RASHIDA: Passed?! I had no control over how I looked. This is my natural hair, these are my natural eyes! Ive never tried to be anything that Im not. Today I feel guilty, knowing that because of the way our genes tumbled out, Kidada had to go through pain I didnt have to endure. Loving her so much, Im sad that Ill never share that experience with her.
Their mothers family didnt quite treat Kidada the same way as they treated Rashida because of her skin complexion:
KIDADA: Let me make this clear: My feelings about my looks were never in comparison to Rashida. It was the white girls in class that I compared myself to. Racial issues didnt exist at home. Our parents werent black and white; they were Mommy and Daddy.
RASHIDA: But it was different with our grandparents. Our dads father died before we were born. We didnt see our dads mother often. I felt comfortable with Mommys parents, whod come to love my dad like a son. Kidada wasnt so comfortable with them. I felt Jewish; Kidada didnt.
Rashida JonesKIDADA: I knew Mommys parents were upset at first when she married a black man, and though they did the best they could, I picked up on what I thought was their subtle disapproval of me. Mommy says they loved me, but I felt estranged from them.
While Rashida stayed and excelled at Buckley, Kidada bumped from school to school; she got expelled from 10 in all because of behavior problems, which turned out to be related to her dyslexia.
KIDADA: We had a nanny, Anna, from El Salvador. I couldnt get away with stuff with her. Mommy knew Anna could give her the backup she needed in the discipline department because she was my color. Anna was my ethnic mama.
PEGGY: Kidada never wanted to be white. She spoke with a little
twist in her language. She had tude. Rashida spoke more primly, and her identity touched all bases. Shed announce, Im going to be the first female, black, Jewish president of the U.S.!
Kidada and Rashida both had MAJOR social consequences for being biracial, but their experiences were very different:
KIDADA: When I was 11, a white girlfriend and I were going to meet up with these boys she knew. Id told her, because I wanted to be accepted, Tell them Im tan. When we met them, the one she was setting me up with said, You didnt tell me she was black. Thats When I started defining myself as black, period. Why fight it? Everyone wanted to put me in a box. On passports, at doctors offices, when I changed schools, there were boxes to check: Caucasian, Black, Hispanic, Asian. I dont mean any dishonor to my motherwho is the most wonderful mother in the world, and we are so alikebut: I am black. Rashida answers questions about what she is differently. She uses all the adjectives: black, white, Jewish.
RASHIDA: Yes, I do. And I get: But you look so white! Youre not black! I want to say: Do you know how hurtful that is to somebody who identifies so strongly with half of who she is? Still, thats not as bad as when people dont know. A year ago a taxi driver said to me, That Jennifer Lopez is a beautiful woman. Thank God she left that disgusting black man, Puffy. I said, Im black. He tried to smooth it over. IF youre obviously black, white people watch their tongues, but with me they think they can say anything. When people dont know what you are, you get your heart broken daily.
KIDADA: Rashida has it harder than I do: She can feel rejection from both parties.
Kidada finally got what she wanted when her mom decided to let her go to a Black school and thats when EVERYTHING changed for Kidada:
PEGGY: As Kidada grew older, it became clear that she wouldnt be comfortable unless she was around kids who looked more like her. So I searched for a private school that had a good proportion of black students, and when she was 12, I found one.
KIDADA: That changed everything. Id go to my black girlfriends houses andI wanted their life! I lived in a gated house in a gated neighborhood, where playdates were: My security will call your security. Going to my black friends houses, I saw a world that was warm and real, where families sat down for dinner together. At our house, Rashida and I often ate dinner on trays, watching TV in Annas room, because our dada was composing and performing at night and Mom sat in on his sessions.
RASHIDA: But any family, from any background, can have that coziness too.
KIDADA: Im sure thats true, but I experienced all that heart and soul in black families. I started putting pressure on Mommy to let me go to a mostly black public school. I was on her and on her and on her. I wouldnt let up until she said yes.
PEGGY: So one day when Kidada was 14, we drove to Fairfax High, where I gave a fake address and enrolled her.
KIDADA: All those kids! A deejay in the quad at lunch! Bus passes! All those cute black boys; no offense, but I thought white boys were boring. I fit in right away; the kids had my outgoing vibe. My skin and hair had been inconveniences at my other schoolsI could never get those Madonna spiked bangs that all the white girls were wearingbut my girlfriends at Fairfax thought my skin was beautiful, and they loved to put their hands in my hair and braid it. The kids knew who my dad was an my stock went up. I felt secure. I was home.
RASHIDA: Our parents divorced when I was 10; Kidada went to live with Dad in his new house in Bel Air, and I moved with Mom to a house in Brentwood. Mom was very depressed after the divorce, and I made it my business to keep her company.
KIDADA: I wanted to live with Dad not because he was the black parent, but because he traveled. I could get away with more.
RASHIDA: At this time, anyone looking at Kidada and me would have seen two very different girls. I wore my navy blue jumper and crisp white blouse; K wore baggy Adidas sweatsuits and door-knocker earrings. My life was school, school, school. Im with Bill Cosby: Its every bit as black as it is white to be a nerd with a book in your hand.
KIDADA: The fact that Rashida was good at school while I was dyslexic intimidated me and pushed me more into my defiant role. I was ditching classes and going to clubs.
RASHIDA: About this time, Kidada was replacing me with younger girls from Fairfax who she could lead and be friends with.
Quincy Jones with his daughter Kadida (C) and her best friend, singer Aaliyah(L)KIDADA: They were my little sisters, as far as I was concerned.
RASHIDA: When Id go to our dads house on weekends, eager to see Kidada, the new little sisters would be there. Shed be dressing them up like dolls. It hurt! I was jealous!
KIDADA: You felt that? I always thought youd rejected me.
RASHIDA: Still, our love for the same musicPrince, Bobby Brown, Bell Biv DeVoewould bring us together on weekends.
Now it makes sense why Kidada was engaged to Tupac. She chose to be with one of the most prominent pro-Black men of her generation because it probably helped her connect to her Blackness that she was also in search of as a child.
- See more at: http://www.iloveoldschoolmusic.com/...-with-their-blackness/2/#sthash.DGniOUYm.dpuf
